I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
you hid your keys in a box of lucky charms because drunk you was apparently going to eat them for breakfast...
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
Randomize
