Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
drunk me just left notes all around the apt to remind shitfaced me that i have mashed potatoes in the fridge. do not take them down if you come home before me.
My phone now knows what I type and it prompts me with frequently used words. And anytime I use "and" and hit the space key two of the words are "unicorn" and "sausage"
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
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