You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
Last night a drunk chick tried to lick me. If you are trying to lick the zombies, you are too drunk for the haunted house.
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
