My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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