Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
Just saw a girl leaving CVS on her bike with a case of beer. She tried to ride one handed with the case under her other arm and fell over off the sidewalk. I'm glad to see someone else's life is a bigger joke than mine.
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
