i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
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