Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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