i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
