I just saw a hot homeless man
She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs.
OMG. What did u say?
I told her I did too.
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
Randomize
