my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
You should frame my arrest warrant.
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
Randomize
