I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
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