I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
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