he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
