Please don't use social media to get back at me.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
Don't stress. That was a joke. I'd trust my pets with no one else. Accidents happen. Sometimes things go smoothly when you help a neighbor out and sometimes you electrocute their fish. Life is funny that way.
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize