You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
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