I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
Just woke up to Siri reminding me that i need to kill the giant orange spider in my room, because it's sorcery and witchcraft is sacrilegious. Did you give me LSD again!?!??!
Randomize
