just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
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