Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
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