the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
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