ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
One lone grasshopper in the whataburger bathroom. Don't know how it got there. Scared the fuck out of me. Also puked over the side of the silverado fence. The horses looked disappointed. Animal magnetism is beautiful. You taught me well. I love you.
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
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