The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
I gave up sex with dolphins for you.
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
Randomize
