you only like me because i go down faster than a bridge in minnesota
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
Randomize
