Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
finding my wedding ring encrusted in vomit this morning really just topped off last night...
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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