Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize