I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
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