when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
Congratulations! We have a period
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