Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
Randomize
