Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
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