Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Randomize
