that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Randomize
