Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
Randomize
