Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
Randomize
