You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
i already hear my dad disowning me
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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