You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
Randomize
