mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
Randomize
