I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
