Christians are straight up FREAKS
I feel like I'm in dance class right now
her voice is like 435,765 daggers being simultaneously twisted into my eardrum
i'd rather just be hit by a car than answer her phone calls
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
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