Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
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