Just mADE A PArabola og urine
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
Randomize
