I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
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