Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
Randomize