Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
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