if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
Randomize