Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
areolas are like halos for boobs.
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
Randomize
