I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
The cabbie told me fat girls shouldn't wear tight clothes, and that he feels bad for the guys that have to be underneath them, especially because their positions are "very limited" and proceeded to ask me if I had a trash can and if I could throw something away for him. Don't worry though, he promised it wasn't anything "bad". He then handed me a tied up grocery bag with a bunch of wadded up Kleenex that weighed about 3 pounds. To answer your question, yes I made it home. Fml
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Randomize
