I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
We're not piercing ourselves today.
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
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