So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
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