While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize