i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
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