I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
