Where is the hickey?
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
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